The pandemic has bought with it a suspension of life as we know it and our world has shrunk down to the size of our living spaces. The bombardment of conflicting unsettling news, our freedoms taken away, forcing us to refrain from even being close to loved ones and friends, has generated heightened physical and mental anxiety.
These new feelings, hopefully temporary, lead us to question ourselves and how we relate to the world around us. Those lucky enough to live with family or friends in the same space might have an easier time of accepting the current circumstance, as finding immediate physical support makes a world of difference. But those alone will find it more difficult to accept the ‘Now’ and the changes happening within and without the self.
It’s been very difficult for me to loose my job and self-isolate, although I’m a natural introvert and value my frequent alone times at home. Being forced to self-isolate and having your freedoms taken away is very frustrating and depressing to say the least. The days and nights blend into each other and the mental and the physical fatigue are taking their toll.
However, I’m blessed to be able to acknowledge the bright sides of my life. A week before the virus pandemic took over the world, I adopted a cat from the shelter. I named her Giza, a very Egyptian name. She even looks Egyptian, with her kohl outlined eyes. I’ve been delaying adopting a pet for a long time, since I wasn’t secure in my living and career situation. I’m still not secure, but my instinct kicked-in just a week before quarantine and temporary lay-off, insisting it was time to adopt. If not for Giza and the Skype chats I have with family across the world, a more intense insanity would’ve kicked in.
It is very uplifting to learn that adoptions of cats and dogs have increased ten-fold all over the world. It is truly a blessing from our Creator the companionship and love we have from those beautiful creatures. Hard times are instantly made better just from a loving look, cuddle or purr. My days and nights now consist mostly of staring at, cuddling or playing with Giza. The best it can get for me during this horrid situation.
It’s been two months but this situation hasn’t been kind to me in terms of being a productive self. There are many opportunities that I could make use of, but I can’t yet find the mental and physical strength. I’m trying to accept the ‘Now’ and go through the pain. I fear I’m questioning the choices I’ve made in my life more than ever. I wasn’t happy in life before the quarantine and now I’m even unhappier.
Difficult decisions need the be made and I have to understand that I’m not alone. Millions all over the world are facing the same crisis and decision making under even more difficult life circumstances. We will not come out of this the same, the very least how we physically connect with people and objects around us will be altered for a very long time. Our habits, how we view ourselves among the world and what we want from the illusion. Therefore, the current blessings bestowed upon us, no matter how little, need to be counted, thanked for and appreciated.
From my side, I thank God for my health and available sustenance. I thank God for the roof over my head. I thank God for my loving family no matter how far we’re apart. I thank God for bringing me Giza as a companion. I thank God for so much more no matter the outcome… Remember, after every hardship there will be ease. Stay strong.